Second year Medicine ended officially after every sophomore student answered the last number on the Psychiatry exam. This happened on a sunny Thursday, a day which culminated 10 months of so many things that have happened. As soon as I shaded the last number on my Scantron sheet, my sophomore life flashed back at me, from the day 2nd year started, until the moment I finished shading #100 on the exam.
A lot of things surged back as I reflected on how my life went. Medicine, as a post-graduate course, has been a bitter pill to swallow. Bitter as it may taste, the benefits of it were just tremendous, the side effects of it were unpleasant, and the drug interactions with other "drugs" were one of a kind. It was a pill that really packed a punch because 2nd year Med changed the lives of struggling Med students for yet another year. Life will never be the same after another year in Medicine.
First semester went on a good start. Fresh-looking sophomores were so eager to study hard and work their bums off to get high grades. Subjects were new, schedules were new as well, and with everything new, all of us wanted to start on a new leash. It worked, to be honest. Unlike in 1st year, where most of us had uncertainties because of so many academic dilemmas, 2nd year was the time where everyone gets to be optimistic. Most were looking forward into making it to 3rd year as early as June. All of that stemmed from the fact that no one from batch 2012 were left behind, and instead all advanced to 3rd year. The optimism that all of us will make it fueled the hearts and minds of each sophomore struggling to make it through another year in Med school. Despite all of the precepts and the loads of topics that were bombarded to us like a constant air strike, everyone stood their ground and made it sure that during the 1st sem, everything will pass like nothing happen.
After the 1st sem, second semester started to become tough. New subjects were added, schedules were becoming more time-constraining, and students were starting to feel the laziness inside. What made it more toxic were the bunch of requirements that were needed to be done and submitted. Despite all of the hardships and trials, all of us still kept optimistic that all of us will make it through. Such mindset was stuck into our minds, not even a single person from our batch from the start of June (at least for our class) did not drop out. We kept in mind that like 2012, the batch of 2013 will also make it through another tightrope of trials. Exams came and go, practical exams became harder and harder, but no one was taken aback from all of these trials.
Looking back, I reflected on how I fared with my study habits. Back in 1st sem, I invested hard on the major subjects, taking them seriously and earning acceptable grades. Starting that sem for me was like stepping hard on the gas, not noticing the amount of gas left on the tank. Day in and day out, my mind was fixed to focusing on reading transes and books, mixing both like making a cocktail of academic proportions. My mind wasn't burnt out yet. I kept a positive note that when I make it to 2nd sem, I will not think too much on the subjects that will be hard, because I knew that last sem will be the toughest of the year. In 2nd sem, things started to decline: study habits started to falter, the mind was shifting to vacation mode as early as December, priorities were becoming jumbled, and tasks were starting to pile up at a rate that I can't keep up. Those trials made me pray hard to God, asking for a miracle and guidance while I earnestly do my part. It was a sem filled with dilemmas: to study or not to study. A Palarong Med-prioritized 4th Long Exam was a bane for my academic focus. Preparing week in and week out for that event (where we eventually became champs) took its toll on my focus for studies. Nevertheless, even as that took some time from my studies, I never get to lose focus and still kept on passing exams. The 6th Long Exam was my so-called "drug holiday," because it was already the start of preparing for summer, but it was the most jam-packed period of our 2nd year careers. A lot of requirements and exams poured down like bottomless grapefruit juice: bitter and unpleasant. The laziness really started to set in, and fighting the laziness demons was becoming too overwhelming. Still, after 2 weeks of exams, I still couldn't believe I survived a treacherous hell week. In short, from 1st sem to 2nd sem, my focus was like a filled-up tank traveling from Aparri to Jolo without refueling. Nakaka-drain at nakakasira pa ng makina.
As I continued on reflecting on how my life went during 2nd year, a lot of social happenings came surging into my mind. One was how my life changed when I met a new bunch of friends. God only knows what happened between me and my old group. But all of that has passed, and I am happy being my usual, happy self with a new group. I find them very accommodating, accepting, and fun to be with. It sure pulled me out of my boring misery and back to where I really belonged: a life of carefree happiness. Meeting a new kick-ass friend and having kick-ass times with her is another one that is sure to close the book on my 2nd year. I blogged about that just recently, and I hope you refer to that one to answer why meeting her made a mark on my 2nd year life. Another one was going back to my passion of gaming. Back in 1st year, my life revolved too much around books and paper works. With the help of good friends who know how to have a good time, I got to kick back and unwind through the power of gaming. It made me forget stress, though it had its downfalls. Nevertheless, it didn't have too much of an impact on my studying and grades.
On a negative note, there were times that I had my own set of "what if's" and "why's" that came crashing into my positive-thinking life. One of which was why did I deserve such treatment from my old friends? I knew only of all the negative crap that was about me from my new set of friends, and I do not want to push through details. I just believe that the power of Karma will work its way to those who deserve it. Another one was, what if I said something that might have changed another person's perspective of me, what would have happen? Though not saying it isn't too much of a regret, it somewhat pained me not to say it out. It's OK though, at least I didn't incur a social casualty. If someone were to ask what would have I said to that person, please don't even ask me. I don't wish to remember it. It's just moving on, slowly but surely.
I have to admit, I made a lot of mistakes, which I totally regretted. I might have done things which I knew I shouldn't have done, but I believe that God had a reason for that. He knew that during my stay in 2nd year, He wanted me to turn into a new leaf: leave what is past, live with what is present, and anticipate what is in store in the future.
Now that 3rd year (hopefully) is coming, this is now the time to enjoy what is left of my summer. For incoming Juniors, this will be our last summer. I hope that this summer will be really worth it, a summer that is worth reflecting and enjoying. There are still 3 months to think well about before another school year starts. For now, another chapter in my Med school life has closed, and that is a closed case: a case that I might get to open when I look back on how I fared through my years in Medicine.
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